Anyways, I will be on my way Nicaragua in 36 hours...
...And I'm really excited. It definitely beats school and the super cold office I've been working in. And I think that's part of God's preparation for me - He has allowed me to be freezing cold in any setting lower than 80 degrees. And Granada, Nic. is currently 90 degrees "and feels like 99 degrees". Makes me happy!
So in case you haven't asked, here is the typical conversation I have with anyone who asks "What are you doing this summer?"
Inquiring Person: "What are you doing this summer"
Me: "ummm, well, I'm actually going to Nicaragua for the summer"
Inquiring Person: "Oh wow!! That's awesome!"
Me: "Yeahhhh, thanks, I'm really excited. It beats the office"
[awkward silence]
Inquiring Person: "Who are you going down with? your school? your church?"
Me: "Well, actually, kind of both. I have to do an 8 week practicum for school. My parents will be down there for the month of July and asked if I wanted to join them. I decided to go with them, but will be going three weeks before them. Our church has been connecting with the missionaries and the Torres Fuerte church down there and so that's basically my connection.
Inquiring Person: "Oh, so you're going by yourself?"
Me: "Kind of."
Me: "Not really."
[Awkward Silence]
Inquring Person: "So what are you doing down there?"
Me: "Mmmm, I don't really know. That's a great question.
[Awkward Silence]
Inquring Person: "Oh, well, be careful... that's most important." (my least favorite thing they say)
Me: "Ok, I will." [and then shake my head because I'm naively fearless about going right now] [which isn't really the best thing for me]
Seriously, that's pretty much the same script I've said about a hundred times. With a few alterations here and there.
But really, what will I be doing down there?
There are 4 different mission teams that will be going to Nicaragua this summer and I will have the privilege of helping to host them, be a liaison and basically be open arms wherever needed. I am hopefully going to lead a bible study for the teen girls at the church. Honestly, I don't really have a clear idea of what I'll be doing, but it's all the better.
And while I really don't know what I'll be doing, every day I keep reading in Oswald Chambers My Utmost for His Highest and every single day he emphasizes "Trust God", "Be Obedient", "Will to obey", "Will to be filled with His Spirit", "One of the greatest sins is worrying" etc. And yes, uncertainty has been stressing me out. But the Lord keeps telling me to wait on Him, to trust Him, to seek Him out in everything... Chambers writes the following:
"If we are obsessed by God, nothing else can get into our lives - not concerns, nor tribulation, nor worries. And now we understand why our Lord so emphasized the sin of worrying. How can we dare to be so absolutely unbelieving when God totally surrounds us? To be obsessed by God is to have an effective barricade against all the assaults of the enemy"
I don't need to worry even when I am unsure. And when I am told "be careful" I get so frustrated. I know they care and I really appreciate that. And yes, I need to use uttermost common sense and of course be cautious, smart, and careful. But ultimately, I am trusting in my God. As the Psalmist writes:
"He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, 'My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust'" Psalm 91:1-2
May my life revolve around my God... May I will to follow my Lord's will. May He keep me safe, under the shadow of His wings...
Peace
And I know I'm way late on this post, too, but I audibly laughed at the part where you wrote down a typical conversation between you and someone asking about what you're doing this summer. The "awkward silence" fill-ins capped it off for me, because I could see you being really awkward at those moments too. You are a funny girl... in a good way, of course.
ReplyDelete