The Compelling Purpose of God

I've been struggling with understanding what my purpose is: here in Nicaragua, at home in PA, for my life in general. I've recently discovered the four temperaments founded in 4-500's BC and realized that I am the definition of a Phlegmatic. This means that I am one of those middle of the road kind of people with stable emotions that rarely go up or go down. Very few things make me excited and very few things make me sad. I strive for peace among people and want to settle any disputes between other people. This also means that I have very few goals, few passions, few opinions - basically I can be content with the way things are. I would rather have people decide for me and then just deal with what they choose (hence why I hate making decisions and why I tell people I would prefer an arranged marriage). Because I am easily contented and devoid of many passions I can be very lazy at times. I have great intentions but don't care if matters are not dealt with (as long as no one is upset).  I can start things but don't like to finish. (For example, this morning I cut the top off of a pineapple but then got bored of it and walked away and never finished) (or for the fact that I wrote half this blog and then finished it 2 days later)

Anyways, because passions and goals are extremely hard for me to have (I make them up to appease others who can't understand me), I often wonder what God's purpose is for my life. If only he would appear to me and speak in a loud booming voice with bright lights to let me know that my purpose is to blank blank blank I could deal with that. Yet I feel lost and without purpose because I cannot construct my own purpose and I don't know what God has for me. Nor can I easily follow my passions and what I am gifted at if I don't know what those gifts are…

But our Sovereign God has a much greater purpose than I ever know. Lucky for me, life doesn't happen by chance… and so this week in My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers, it is all about the compelling purpose of God. Guess what Bri… you don't need to "know" what your purpose is. You simply need to be in tune to what God has for you. You simply need to be in fellowship and oneness with him - living in obedience to him. 

… what seemed to be failure from man's standpoint was a triumph from God's standpoint, because God's purpose is never the same as man's purpose … What God calls us to cannot be definitely stated, because His call is simply to be His friend to accomplish His own purposes. Our real test is in truly believing that God knows what He desires… If we are in fellowship and oneness with God and recognize that He is taking us into His purposes, then we will no longer strive to find out what His purposes are … A Christian is someone who trusts in the knowledge and the wisdom of God, not in his own abilities. If we have a purpose of our own, it destroys the simplicity and the calm, relaxed pace which should e characteristic of the children of God ...

To my self: Since you are easily contented, perhaps you need to be content with simply being obedient to what God calls you to - even if it seems dumb - if it seems purposeless - if it's babysitting kids so that parents have the opportunity to hear the word of God - if it's pouring a glass of water for the person that drives you crazy - if it means staying back and letting other people have the opportunity to serve - if it means being tired but trudging through because that's what you are called to do. Do you actually believe that God knows what He desires and that he is fulfilling his own purposes in his own time?